The _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
(the title in Secret Code)
(an adult children's book)
(still in the edit phase)
What can I say about mom? She is 100% Texan but she sings songs about far away exotic places like Oklahoma. I know that this may sound mean, but my mom is not a good mom. I love her and all, but she stinks at being a mother. Not every mom can be a cook, seamstress, carpooling, bill paying, church going kind of woman. My mom likes men. Lots of men. She flirts a lot. Online, offline, in grocery store lines, getting the mail at the post office, gassing up her Jeep, anywhere there is a man around, she turns on her loud “look at me” charm and laughter. I’ve watched men flock to her like dogs to a pork chop. It’s disgusting to watch, but at the same time, it’s kind of entertaining too. All that being said, I love her because she is my mom. When I was born, she was 15 years old. I’m 13 now, so she is only 28 years young. I don’t know my dad, but I think that I must have gotten my smarts from him because he hightailed it out of our lives as soon as he found out that mom was going to have a baby. That is what mom says anyway. I consider that to have been a wise move on his part. I don’t know the truth about the other half of me nor will I probably ever discover what my heritage is on my father’s side. You see, my mom is not only a flirt and a smoker, she is a chronic liar too. She makes up stories about the goofiest things when the truth would be juicier to tell. What can I say? Lying runs in the family along with insanity.
One time, she met a man on a dating website and told him that she was a child psychologist and an avid softball player and that she got her degree at the University of Texas compliments of a softball scholarship. Mom is NOT athletic at all. They met, she flirted, he fell for it for about two weeks and then realized she was full of Dixie droppings. Why lie? It makes no sense to me and yet it makes perfect sense. Does that make sense?
Thanks for letting me express my thoughts today.
I am glad that I get to talk to you, my best friend.
By the way, my best friend is:
The first time that I saw you, I was frightened. You scared me to death. Now that I have gotten to know you and have discovered what you are about, I can say that my life will never be anything less than EXTRAORDINARY!
You'll have to wait for the book to come out for the rest.....